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Designer Label No-No’s

Thursday, March 27th, 2008

When my father-in-law took delivery of his first brand-new car in the 1960’s, he and the car salesman got into a fight. It seems the dealer had affixed the metal dealership logo to the trunk (Jones Chevrolet, Knoxville - or whatever), and Weldon wanted it gone.

“But we always put our logo on all the cars we sell,” the dealer insisted. “So everyone will know where they can get a car like yours.”

Weldon thought about it for a moment and said, “I’ll give you two choices: you can either pay me $50 a month to lease that ad space on my trunk, or you can remove that logo from my car right now.”

The dealer removed the logo.

That story popped into my head recently as I watched a twenty-something strut through the mall in head-to-toe designer logos, acting like she was heaven’s gift to retail. In reality, she is - as are the millions of others who walk around with brand names and logos proudly emblazoned on their shirts, pants, bags, and sunglasses. After all, if design houses actually had to PAY for all that advertising - instead of the customers paying THEM — they’d probably go broke.

All in all, it’s a brilliant marketing ploy: establish yourself as a luxury brand, create a recognizable logo, and then slap it all over inexpensive stuff that the “average” person can afford. It got Pierre Cardin throw out of the Chambre Syndicale when he first did it back in 1959, but hey, being a pioneer has its challenges. As his peers soon realized, going downscale on basic items does wonders for the cash flow as the masses trip all over themselves to prove that for $39.95, they, too, can afford to “dress designer.”

Now yes, I’m being cynical. But having class and style isn’t about owning designer labels. It’s about knowing your body type and your clothing personality, understanding what’s appropriate for your lifestyle, and finding apparel and accessories that work with all of the above. I’ve seen women stop traffic in $40 worth of clothes from Wal-Mart while others disappear like wallflowers in thousands’ worth of designer apparel. It’s HOW you wear your clothes that makes the difference, not who made them or how much they cost. After all, you’re supposed to wear your clothes, not let them wear you.

With that in mind, here are some definite “No-no’s” when it comes to designer labels:

1. Don’t Wear the Name on the Outside

Generally, if the brand name, logo, or lettering is more than a ¼” high and is prominently featured on the outside of the garment or accessory, don’t wear it. With the exception of Louis Vuitton, those large, football jersey-type logos are generally among the least expensive items in a designer’s line and are neither stylish nor elegant. Avoid them.

Ralph Lauren Tote
Ralph Lauren Tote
Overstock.com

2. Don’t Buy It Just for the Label

Never buy something just because of the name on the tag. If you wouldn’t buy it if it DIDN’T have a designer label, don’t buy it just because it does. Be more discerning.

3. Don’t Dress Head-to-Toe in One Name

A Burberry scarf, coat, and bag. Chanel jewelry, dress, and shoes. You may love every piece, but don’t go overboard with the labels. It makes you look unschooled. Save your money and increase your style quotient by buying one item and making it the focal point of your ensemble.

4. Don’t Fall for the “Designer du Jour”

Every so often a talented new designer will emerge and “anyone who’s anyone” becomes an instant devotee. Whether the clothes suit them or not, many women flock to this new camp so they can follow the “in” designer. Don’t do that. Flip through fashion magazines and peruse style sites to determine which designers cater to YOUR philosophy, not the other way around. You can’t be a fashion leader if all you do is follow the crowd.

5. NEVER Buy Fakes

Ever have someone steal your ideas and present them as their own? Now you know how designers feel every time someone sells a fake or knockoff of their work. But that’s only half the story. If you follow the money trail of that counterfeit merchandise, you’ll find an ugly tale of international slave labor, pirating, mob connections, and more. Don’t contribute to it. Only buy your merchandise from reputable dealers so you can sleep as well as you dress.

The blight of the fashion industry in New York City
Illegal street vendor
in Lower Manhattan

Wearing luxury brands has long been a privilege of the rich and famous. But with all the choices available to you today, you don’t have to have a lot of money to dress well or even to wear designer labels. You just need to know what looks good on you and what’s appropriate for your lifestyle. If you can resist the urge to become a billboard for your favorite brands and simply adhere to the basic tenets of dressing well, you can look rich and elegant regardless of your budget. Try it yourself and see.

 

Need more help in finding the right styles for your body, personality, and lifestyle? Download a copy of WARDROBE MAGIC to see how easy dressing well can be.

Wardrobe Magic

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The Spring 2008 Review

Thursday, March 13th, 2008

It’s that time of year again: time to put away the coats, boots, and heavy fabrics of winter and pull out your warm weather clothes.

Whether you’ll be working, traveling, or enjoying a little “fun in the sun” (or all of the above) this spring and summer, there are some really cute looks out there for you. From feminine frills and wild colors to vintage styles and up-to-date classics, there’s a little something for everyone.

Just keep a few basic guidelines in mind:

    1. Shop with a list; know what you have and what you need so you can stay in budget.

    2. You will not look good in everything you see (nobody does). Stick with the styles and silhouettes that flatter you most and don’t be swayed by looks that don’t work for you.

    3. Some colors will NOT work with your skin tone, regardless of what the sales girl on commission tells you. If you look pasty under those dingy dressing room lights, you’ll look pasty everywhere else.

    4. Add one trendy, inexpensive accessory (like a handbag or shoes) that will make you feel cute and chic all season.

    5. Invest in classics; go cheap on trends.

With these guidelines in mind, here are some of the most eye-catching, figure-friendly looks of the season:

Feminine Ruffles and Lace 

If you like to get in touch with your girlie side every now and again, you’re definitely in luck this season. From ruffles and lace to ribbons and bows, you’ll find plenty to choose from this season. Just keep in mind that some of these embellishments can make what they’re put against seem bigger, so keep them away from your trouble spots, like hips, tummy, or thighs. Otherwise, enjoy!

 

 

Feminine styles
JessicaLondon.com

 

 

Feminine ruffles
Macys.com

Flirty Sundresses 

Reach for fun, flirty sundresses for all of your after-hours fun. They keep you cooler than shorts and are dressy enough to take you to restaurants and museums. But don’t wear them to work unless you top them with a jacket or light sweater; business situations call for more coverage, so DON’T “dare to go bare” at work (or church, for that matter). These places call for more coverage and formality.

 

 

Flirty Sundress
Chadwicks.com

 

Flirty Sundress
LewMagram.com

 

 

Cropped, Three Quarter Sleeve Jacket 

No, it’s not your imagination - you’ve seen this look before. The cropped, three quarter sleeve jacket was “all the rage” in the 1960’s, and it’s making a comeback for both spring and fall. Pair them with slim skirts, pants, or cropped pants for a chic, easy look. But be careful: because of the short proportion, this style is not very friendly to those who are petite, have a short waist, or who carry extra weight at the waistline or tummy. Proceed with caution.

 

 

Cropped jacket
Roamans.com

 

 

Cropped Jacket
Chadwicks.com

Wide Leg Trousers 

Wide leg trousers continue to be popular, including those with exaggerated or palazzo-style hems. While wide leg pants can lengthen and slenderize heavy thighs and legs, they can also overwhelm very thin legs, so be careful. Avoid styles with cuffs if you’re petite.

 

Wide leg trousers
Chadwicks.com

Wide Leg Trouser
Macys.com

Classic Favorites 

Like sheaths? Pencil skirts? Shirtdresses? Trench coats? You’re in luck! You’ll find all those classic silhouettes in abundance this year, so be sure to stock up on the styles that flatter you most. The great thing about classics is that you can wear them for years, and they can serve as a simple background for eye-catching shoes, necklaces, or bags.

 

 
Classic trench
LaRedoute.com

 

 
Classic sheath
JessicaLondon.com

Animal Prints 

What’s the continuing fascination with animal prints? They’ve been popular the last several years, and continue to roar this season. If you want to add a little “animal magnetism” to your apparel or accessories, just be sure to do so in small doses. This is one print where it’s easy to get too much of a good thing.

 

Animal Prints
Roamans.com

Animal prints
Macys.com

Metallics 

Like crows captivated by shiny objects, the fashion industry continues to favor metallics of all sorts. From coats and blouses to belts and bags, you can shine like a million this summer. Just be sure to stick with the colors that look best on you so all those metals don’t wash you out.

 

Metallic tank
LewMagram.com

 

Metallic jacket
Macys.com

Bright Colors 

Just as nature puts on a bright, colorful show each spring with its flowers, grasses, and trees, so too will you find a lot of bright colors in stores this season. Hot pink, lemon yellow, turquoise blue, lime green - it’ll be easy to stand out in a crowd! Just be sure to pick the best colors for your skin tone. Particularly popular this year: matching shoes to clothing color for head-to-toe brightness. It’s a cute look, but it can visually “chop up” smaller bodies and be hard on the budget. To get longer-looking legs and save money and closet space, you might want to opt for flesh-colored shoes instead.

 

 

Bright suit with matching shoes
Roamans.com

 

 

Bright sheath with flesh-colored shoes
JessicaLondon.com

Artistic Sleeves 

Puffed, petal, bishop, kimono - designers have fallen in love with interesting, artistic sleeves again. Whether you want to cover up, show off, or play “peek-a-boo” with your arms, there’s a sleeve out there for you. Just make sure it flatters and fits. Stay away from puffed sleeves if you have broad shoulders, heavy upper arms, or a large chest, for example, and avoid raglan and saddle-shoulder styles if your arms are very long and thin. Your goal is to visually minimize your trouble spots, not call attention to them.

 

 

Puffed sleeves
LaRedoute.com

 

Angel sleeve
Roamans.com

Statement Necklaces 

Want a simple way to draw attention to your face and update your wardrobe without spending a lot on clothes? Try a few big statement necklaces. Flowers, animal shapes, shiny beads, bright metals — pick whatever you like. Just don’t overdo it (like Nicole Kidman at the Oscars™); scale pieces to your size and proportion for an up-to-moment yet easy look.

Statement necklace
JessicaLondon.com

 

Statement necklace
SmartBarg ains.com

These are my top picks for the season. Add a handful of pieces that compliment your body shape and lifestyle and you’ll look youthful and current regardless of your age, shape, size, or budget.

Need more help in conquering your closet so you can finally build a wardrobe that works? Download a copy of WARDROBE MAGIC to see how easy looking pulled together can be.

Wardrobe Magic

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How to Manage Your Image “Old Hollywood” Style

Thursday, February 28th, 2008

Back in the “Golden Age” of Hollywood, movie stars were glamorous. They looked good in every film, at every premiere, and at every awards show and their loyal fans lined up to see their movies and buy magazines in which they appeared. Whenever a camera was trained on them, they looked like they moved in a rarified circle, beyond the reach of moral men. Sure, they had their problems, but the bad stuff was usually kept off the front page and well out of sight. Only the shine showed through.

Fast forward to today. The glamour has been replaced by scandal and sensation, and we’re more likely to see a mug shot or a crash site photo than shots of gifted performers enjoying the jet set life. Movie star style has been replaced by stylists and designer product placement, and many celebrities are better known for their off-screen antics than their on-screen roles.

So what changed?

The decline of the studio system and the rise of multi media.

In the 1930’s and 40’s, Hollywood studios controlled everything in film production, from finding and cultivating talent to distributing movies in the theaters. Like giant factories, each studio would crank out thirty to sixty movies a year and maintain a stable of actors, writers, directors, and behind-the-scenes people to plug into those projects as needed. Lead actors might work on three or four movies a year; minor, supporting actors might work on ten or fifteen. Most movies were shot on the studio lots on a tight budget and short time frame, and only the most bankable actors or directors could pick and choose their projects. Usually, movies were assigned. If a talent didn’t like a film, that was too bad; if he wined or complained, he could be cut from projects, loaned to other studios, or even dropped from contract. It was a bottom-line, formulaic business, and creativity - while important - always came second. All that control was the bad part about studios.

The good part was that they truly cultivated their people. They took raw talent and turned it into box office gold through training and careful grooming. Actors and actresses were taught how to dress, walk, talk, and behave like movie stars. Some got new hair and new makeup; others got new names and new noses. This training was so complete, in fact, that when the “Best Dressed” lists first appeared in the early 40’s to stimulate the war-trodden fashion industry, movie stars were kept off the list because they had the unfair advantage of being dressed by their studios. Studios also managed to keep a lot of bad behavior out of the headlines because it was bad for business and chipped away at the Hollywood mystique.

That history came to mind as I watched the Oscar™ Red Carpet pre-show the other night. As one actress strolled down the red carpet in haute couture, chomping on a wad of chewing gum while cameras flashed away, another bragged to an interviewer that she would never get out of her jeans if it weren’t for the amazing work of {insert popular stylist name here}.

Wow.

They can command millions for their work but they can’t dress themselves properly or chew with their mouths closed? Hmm. Kind of makes you wonder just what warrants those big paychecks. It also makes me want to wait until their films hit cable instead of paying full price at the theater. There’s no mystery with these people. They’re just the “average Joe.”

That’s what set the “Old Hollywood” crowd apart. Those stars didn’t seem average. They seemed beyond reach. They were like the cool kids in school, moving in an elite circle that others wanted to be part of but just couldn’t quite manage to swing. Even today, fifty, sixty, seventy years later, you can watch a movie from that era and have that sense of wonder and awe. What would it be like to hang out with Katherine Hepburn, Carole Lombard, Humphrey Bogart, or Clark Gable? What could you learn from Bette Davis or Joan Crawford? What beauty tips could you glean from Veronica Lake or Marilyn Monroe?

Yes, there are celebrities today that people clamor to see. But will their popularity survive the test of time? It’s hard to say. The biggest blockbusters these days seem to be heavy on the special effects and light on the talent and storylines. Will the “A-Listers” of today even be remembered fifty years from now?

Will you?

If you’re busy following the crowd, trying to fit in or “keep up with the Joneses”, you probably won’t be. Sorry, but if life is like a casting call and you’re just like everyone else, how can you expect to stand out? The only way you can realistically shoot for a larger part/a better title/a bigger paycheck is if you bring “something extra” to the table that no one else does.

For some, it’s better skills or a unique skill that no one else has. For others, it’s a better wardrobe or manners that make the difference. For “A-Listers,” it’s a combination of both: good skills and proper packaging. Such finesse will set you apart from your peers today, and make you the standard bearer in your field for years to come.

Here’s how to strive for it:

1. Take a good, honest look at your current skills. What’s good? What’s not so good? What could use some work? If your skills are good, then strive to add a unique but related skill to set yourself apart. If a “triple threat” in Hollywood is someone who can act, dance, and sing, what’s a “triple threat” in your industry? Someone who can research, write, and speak? Create, market, and administer? Play, perform, and coach? Think about it and expand your skills.

2. Take a good, honest look at how you dress. Is your wardrobe appropriate for your position and industry? Do you know what to wear at different levels in your career? Do you know how to dress appropriately for different occasions? If not, then it’s time to find out.

3. Take a good, honest look at your manners. Could you dine at a fine restaurant or a backyard barbecue with equal ease? Do you know how to say “thank you” or receive praise with equal grace? Could you pass through a diplomatic receiving line without feeling like a fraud? If not, read books or take classes on etiquette. Nice manners are in short supply these days but still appropriate for every occasion.

4. In almost every industry, those who excel get pushed into the spotlight to speak, write, and teach others. Could you do so with confidence, knowing your skills and appearance are “up to snuff”? Or would you “freak out” and say NO to an invitation because you couldn’t stand the scrutiny? Plan for success by getting your writing and presenting skills in order now.

5. Finally, manage your public image with care. Respect your own privacy by setting boundaries of what you share with others. If you don’t want something repeated, don’t say it in the first place. If you don’t want racy photos published, don’t pose for them to begin with. If you have indiscretions in your past that you don’t want revealed, keep them hidden as best you can - and then come up with a good story to tell should they ever come to light. The Internet has enabled secrets and scandals to be flashed around the world in an instant, and those who seek to curtail your success will use your comments, bad photos, and secrets to “keep you in your place.” Don’t let them. Think before you speak, drink in moderation or not at all when in a group, and never behave like a spoiled teenager. Show class; don’t be crass.

Just reading through this list, you can see why “Old Hollywood” style seems in such short supply these days. Yes, it takes time and effort to groom yourself for a lead role in your industry or community. But you’ve probably already worked hard to get where you’re at; why not go that extra step and enjoy all the rewards that go along with it? You may be delighted by the new company you’ll keep.

Good luck!

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Sex, Dress, and Power in 2008

Saturday, February 16th, 2008

Does what you wear have an impact on how you’re perceived as a leader? That’s the question that’s been burning up the fashion blogosphere the last few weeks, ever since Hillary Clinton declined to appear on the cover of VOGUE magazine and Editor Anna Wintour took umbrage. The story makes an interesting case study regardless of your politics, because it reinforces the importance of knowing how to dress appropriately for your industry and position. If you work in a male-dominated field, I encourage you to take notes.Here’s the story:

Senator Clinton was invited and agreed to appear on the February cover of VOGUE. The day she was supposed to be photographed and interviewed, she bowed out, saying that on second thought, she had decided that being on the magazine would make her seem “too feminine” in her race for the presidency.Annoyed, Ms. Wintour responded at length in the February issue of the magazine, saying, among other things, “The notion that a contemporary woman must look mannish in order to be taken seriously as a seeker of power is frankly dismaying. How has our country come to this? This is America, not Saudi Arabia.”

So who’s right and who’s wrong: Clinton or Wintour?They both are.

Right and wrong, that is.The reasons are subtle and not politically correct, but let me take a stab at it:

On the one hand, you have a woman who has made it to the top of a female-dominated industry. Fashion magazines have been published regularly since “Godey’s Lady’s Book” appeared in 1830, and women have been writing for them almost as long - one of the few industries where women were welcomed early on. Not only does Anna Wintour wear whatever she wants to work, she influences what millions of OTHER women wear to work through her magazine’s layouts, articles, and ads. Of course she can’t understand why a woman can’t be both feminine and powerful; she’s been feminine and powerful her entire career.On the other hand, you have a woman who has made it to the top of a male-dominated industry. Hillary Clinton started practicing law in the early 1970’s when women were few and unwelcomed in the courtroom. She’s had things said and done to her that would have sent other women screaming in the other direction, and she has the battle scars to prove it. Now, as the first woman to run for president, she’s again treading into unfriendly territory. She dresses plainly and conservatively because she learned long ago that being feminine in a male industry is a liability instead of an asset.

Not fair, you say?Life rarely is. But if you look at the underlying psychology, you’ll begin to see why things have evolved the way they have. Western women are not required to don the traditional abaya worn by their Islamic sisters, as Ms. Wintour suggests, but they do need to understand a few things about how to dress when working with men.

Let’s break this down to basics:In the animal world, all the species have lived or died based on their ability to reproduce. When fish, animals, and insects look for mates, they seek the strongest, healthiest, most powerful specimens in order to accomplish this goal.

It’s the same in the human world. Our language, manners, and culture may set us apart from the animals, but our basic, most primal urge is still the same: to attract the strongest, healthiest, most powerful mates in order to reproduce. Even if we’re not conscious of this, even if we have no plans to reproduce, from exercising to exfoliating, women and men still regularly engage in behaviors to attract mates.So what does this have to do with Senator Clinton and VOGUE?

Keep reading. It will make sense in a minute.In her book “Survival of the Prettiest” (1999), Dr. Nancy Etcoff, a psychologist at Harvard Medical School, reports that while we’re told as children that “beauty is only skin deep” or “in the eye of the beholder,” the reality is that attractive people have long be rewarded for their beauty throughout history in nearly every culture in the world.

Pretty girls have more friends as children, are sought after by more men as adults, and are hired more quickly and paid higher wages than their less attractive counterparts. Women learned long ago that beauty is a commodity, which is why we have evidence of lipstick dating from 5,000 B.C., why Cleopatra bathed in milk and honey for luminous skin, and why we spend more money on beauty products today in the United States than on education and social services combined. Beautiful models and actresses are among the highest paid women in the world.For women throughout history and around the world, beauty equals power.

But for men, physical prowess and ample resources equal power.Just as male lions, gorillas, and deer viciously fight each other for the right to claim females and territory, so do men battle each other for the right to claim women and property. Sometimes it’s been just that base, as in war, but more often it’s played out elaborately over time by growing strong, gaining knowledge, and accumulating wealth.

To this end, as in the animal kingdom, men create an ongoing, unspoken dominance hierarchy in order to establish who’s the “alpha male” in any given situation.Dr. Etcoff describes it this way:

    Males form ranks quickly, even as boys. In boys’ camps, rank order develops in cabins within an hour. The top-ranked boy isn’t necessarily the biggest, but often the best-looking, most athletic boy who shows the most mature physique. The top boy initiates and organizes, and lower-ranking boys obey and question. Their submission is rewarded by the dominant boy’s protection and his leadership. (1)

The medieval feudal system is a formal example of this hierarchy, as are the various ranks in military, government, churches, and corporations.

But it’s not always so formal. Watch any group of men together and you’ll see this dynamic in action, even if they’re all completely unaware of it. Ever wonder why young men always seem so hot-tempered and quick to come to blows when they disagree? They’re trying to establish dominance. Ever wonder why guys like to watch football, boxing, or movies with gory battle scenes? Because they like seeing OTHER strong males establish dominance.Guys learn early how to demoralize their opponents and how to find and exploit each other’s weaknesses to gain the upper hand. Even when they’re just joking around with their friends, men say things to each other in this ranking ritual that would end a similar friendship between women.

Now take a bunch of these strong, dominant males who are used to battling each other for resources, and drop an attractive, feminine woman into the mix who seeks the same resources. What do you get?Well, once they stop laughing, as they did at the beginning of the women’s movement, their first impulse might be to either sleep with her or push her into a low-ranking position out of their way. If she resists, then they’ll treat her like any other challenging male: they’ll “tap swords” to get an idea of her strength before they start looking for weaknesses and testing her endurance. Often, they’ll set aside the nice manners they use to court women and revert to the rougher “locker room” language and behavior they use among themselves. So what if she’s offended? It means she’s weak and doesn’t belong.

Now obviously, this doesn’t describe every man on the planet. There are lots of nice guys out there all along the alpha-omega scale. Kind, funny, helpful, and respectful, they barely resemble the dominant males I just described.But those dominant alphas are out there, mark my word. They tend to congregate en masse in high power, high income, male-dominated industries like law, medicine, politics, and professional sports, and in departments where big egos and big paychecks go hand-in-in. They may treat their sweethearts like princesses, lavishing them with pretty baubles, then turn right around and steamroll any woman that gets in their way, including competitors and support staff. If you plan to do battle with them, you must go prepared.

So dress femininely to attract men, but gender-neutrally to do business with them? That hardly seems fair!It isn’t. But in many male-dominated, highly competitive industries, it’s the reality.

Yes, I know it defies logic - kind of like the ongoing fascination with Britney Spears - but research shows it’s the most effective way to go about it. Women have a lot more latitude now that we did thirty years ago, and certainly much more freedom than many women around the world, but I think it’s going to be a while longer before we can dress in feminine frills and still be perceived as a strong leader of men.See how subtle and “un-p.c.” this is?

So to return to the original question: does what you wear have an impact on how you’re perceived as a leader?Absolutely!

If you’re in a women-dominated industry (fashion, beauty, interior design, the arts) dressing fashionably and femininely can have a positive impact on your bottom line. If you’re lauded for your beauty or sense of style and grace, then you’re a woman to be envied and emulated.But in male-dominated industries (finance, science, electronics, oil), where strength and power are desired, being fashionable and feminine is seen as a weakness. You need clothes that are strong and crisp and that draw attention to your business savvy rather than your feminine curves. You want men to listen to your ideas, not check out your cleavage.

So yes, Anna Wintour is correct in saying that women can dress femininely and still be taken seriously - but only in certain fields. Spending too much time on how you look can hurt your credibility in many industries.And yes, Senator Clinton is correct in saying that appearing on a fashion magazine may make her seem “too feminine” in her quest for the presidency. At the same time, UNDER-estimating the importance of wardrobe can also hurt your credibility. While her clothes are usually conservative and modestly cut, which is appropriate for politics, she sometimes wears colors, patterns, and styles that don’t flatter, fit, or command attention. Her selections seem haphazard. She has no signature look. She may be seeking the highest office in the land, but you wouldn’t know it by how she dresses.By contrast, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice “gets” power dressing. Tailored, flattering cuts in rich fabrics and strong colors, you know at a glance that she’s a powerful, wealthy woman by how she dresses. Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi has also does a very good job of sporting flattering styles in luxe fabrics. Her color choices sometimes stray off the power path - like the lilac-colored suit she wore for the last State of the Union Address, for example - but by and large, she also dresses like a powerful woman in a male-dominated industry.So yes, what you wear has a HUGE impact on how you’re perceived as a leader. So make sure your clothes say that you’re ready, willing, and able to do the job, and nothing’s going to stand in your way.

Need some more advice on what’s appropriate for your industry? Download a copy of BUSINESS WEAR MAGIC:

http://www.businesswearmagic.com

To learn how to “dress for success” in your field.

Business Wear Magic

(1) “Survival of the Prettiest” by Nancy Etcoff, Anchor Books (1999), pages 74-75.

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A Guide to Elegance

Friday, January 25th, 2008

Do you have elegance?

Do you take such care with your appearance and manners that people regularly compliment you? Do you have a flair for style and grace that others try to emulate? Do you frequently receive compliments on your children’s manners and appearance?

If so, quit reading. You don’t need me.

But if the answer is “sometimes” or “rarely”, perhaps a little help is in order. For in a society where nice manners and dressing well seem as nostalgic as having a milkman or wearing a hat and gloves to church, those with elegance tend to stand out in a crowd. They also tend to command the biggest salaries, the most visible positions, and incredible influence.

Take, for instance, Carrie Marcus.

Carrie was born into a German immigrant family in Louisville, Kentucky in 1883. She never finished high school, as was typical of women of that time, but her culturally-minded parents collected an excellent home library and encouraged Carrie and her brother Herbert to make good use of it. This early exposure to art, history, literature, and music set the basis for a lifetime of high achievement.

The Marcuses moved to northeast Texas in the mid-1890’s, where Herbert contributed to the family income by selling clothes in a local store. A few years later, he left home and took a job at the Spangler Brothers department store in Dallas. Carrie soon followed and landed a sales position at A. Harris, a women’s specialty shop.

In 1900, Dallas was primarily a cattle town where farmers came to sell their livestock. It smelled bad, looked rough, and housed more bars in its small downtown area than any other type of business. But with its active railhead and strategic location, Dallas was the best place to market cattle in the southwest. Then, with their pockets full of cash after selling their herds, cattle barons would pump money right back into the local economy by loading up on supplies before going home.

Enter: Carrie Marcus.

The pretty seventeen year-old had always loved beautiful clothes and took great pride and pleasure in helping her customers find flattering ensembles. Like a bright light on a dark night, the women of Dallas were drawn to Carrie’s sense of style and grace and sought her out. She was generous with her knowledge and her customers, in turn, were generous with their patronage. By the age of twenty one, Carrie Marcus was one of the highest paid women in Texas, making $100 a month (when the average household income was around $600 per year).

By contrast, Herbert made just $35 a month at Spangler Brothers where, like Carrie, he worked hard, had a loyal clientele, and produced high numbers. When Herbert and his wife Minnie had a baby in 1905, he asked his boss for a raise and was begrudgingly granted an additional five dollars a month. Given his track record and years of service, Herbert got ticked off — and quit.

He was so mad, in fact, that he moved his young family to Atlanta. He even convinced Carrie and her dapper new husband, Al Neiman, to come along and start a sales promotion business with him. The trio was so successful that within two years, another company offered to buy their business for $25,000. Missing their friends, family, and the retail trade back in Texas, they accepted the offer and returned to Dallas.

They decided to open an exclusive women’s clothing shop selling the highest quality ready-to-wear apparel available outside of New York or Paris. It was an ambitious plan that was laughed at by just about everyone - except the owners of Spangler Brothers and A. Harris, who had reason to fear.

As Herbert and Al oversaw final construction and put together a marketing plan in the summer of 1907, Carrie boarded a train to New York on her first buying trip. She was nervous about the money. Opening the store had cost a lot more than planned, and they’d gone through their $25,000 renting, staffing, and setting up the place. They’d had to borrow additional funds from family and friends for Carrie to purchase inventory, and she wasn’t sure how far it would go. Within hours of hitting the garment district, she was out of money with only a small inventory to show for it.

But Carrie Marcus Neiman was not the average department store buyer, and the hard-boiled New York garmentos recognized this immediately. With her sense of style, her impeccable manners, her business savvy, and a sales ability unlike any they’d seen, several of them took a chance and did something no business man in his right mind would do at the time: they extended credit.

To a woman.

A petite, pretty, 24-year-old woman from a cattle town they’d never heard of at the end of the earth in Texas. She had charmed them so completely that they gave her tens of thousands of dollars’ worth of their best merchandise on the promise that she would pay for it later.

The risk paid off. Neiman Marcus opened in September 1907 to a stampede of customers who depleted the exquisite inventory in a matter of days. The store sat empty for nearly a month awaiting new merchandise. It still turned a profit that very first year, as it has ninety nine out of the last one hundred years. The only time they ever posted a loss was during the Great Depression - a few months before someone struck oil in east Texas.

As the fortunes of Dallas changed from cattle to oil and new money poured into town, Carrie did what she’d done before: she taught the oil barons’ wives how to dress. She had weekly fashion shows. She gave demonstrations. She waited on customers herself. For many, an hour of Carrie’s time was worth more than months of therapy. When Carrie died in 1953, the people of Dallas and the fashion industry mourned her loss.

(Source: Neiman Marcus: Last of the Merchant Kings, Biography.com)

So what does all of this have to do with you?

Well, seeing how other people succeed gives you an opportunity to determine how you might incorporate some of their winning elements into your own mix. Most people just try to copy something they like from others - a hairstyle, a handbag, a coat - without understanding why it might or might not work for them.

Carrie Marcus didn’t succeed because she bought a certain brand or wore her hair in a certain way; she succeeded because she understood how to dress people using the tools at her disposal. It’s the difference between following a recipe and creating a cookbook. One requires little thought; the other requires a mastery of skills. In Carrie’s case, she mastered elegance.

Now think about some of the people who were considered elegant: Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly, Jacqueline Kennedy, and Cary Grant. What did they have in common? An unwavering dedication to excellence: simple lines, sumptuous fabrics, graceful walks, and unforgettable voices.

When you stop to consider WHAT makes things so great by digging below the surface and learning about quality, a funny thing happens: you become more discerning. You stop being distracted by trends or cheap imitations and start refining your choices. You become more elegant.

Elegance — refined, tasteful beauty of manner, form, or style — takes dressing well and using nice manners to a level where so few people tread that everyone else can’t help but look and be fascinated. It’s about understanding lines, form, function, and aesthetic to an artistic degree, then combining them thoughtfully and presenting them graciously. While some people seem to have a natural flair for elegance, most who aspire to it require study and practice to get it right.

So how can you “up” your elegance quotient?

Here are some guidelines:

APPEARANCE

    1. Assess your body, find the most flattering cuts and styles, and stick with them. Don’t be distracted by trends that don’t flatter; instead, build a wardrobe of inter-connected pieces that look great individually yet work well together.

    2. Strive to dress appropriately for every occasion. From ball games to charity balls, work to working out, there’s a dress code for every time and place. Learn it and show your knowledge.

    3. Wear undergarments that flatter your figure and disappear under your clothes. No visible straps, panty lines, or strange bulges, please.

    4. Wear well-made accessories that flatter you proportionally and that compliment your ensembles. The more you coordinate your wardrobe, the fewer accessories you need.

    5. Take time for proper grooming. Update your hairstyle, polish your makeup, keep breath fresh, and nails clean and nicely formed.

BEHAVIOR

    1. “Please” and “thank you” are still the magic words and are almost always appropriate for every occasion. Apply generously.

    2. Use dining etiquette whenever you sit down to eat. Chew with your mouth closed, keep elbows off the table, and use your napkin, utensils, and other dining implements appropriately.

    3. Hone your voice, diction, and vocabulary to speak confidently yet put people at ease. A screeching, grating, or wimpy voice is as unattractive as coarse language and a limited vocabulary; banish them from use.

    4. Strive for good posture, a graceful walk, and controlled gestures. Slouching, lumbering, and erratic movements do not an elegant woman make.

    5. Expand your mind by learning about art, architecture, cuisine, clothing, literature, music, and more. Turn off the television and visit museums, attend a ballet, take a cooking class, or go to the library. It’s a much better use of your time and brain power.

In short, strive for some artistry and excellence in your manner and style. You may not succeed 24/7, but even a little effort some of the time will meet with startling success. Make thoughtful choices in your clothing and manner and before you know it, you may be attracting the type of people or situations that make you as influential as Carrie Marcus.

Good luck!

 

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Popularity: 7% [?]

The Image Domino Effect

Friday, January 11th, 2008

What if you could change something about your image, like your hair or clothes or accessories, and have it impact your life? What if, with one small change, you could suddenly find your situation going in a very different direction?

Sound impossible?

It’s not. In fact, I’ve seen it happen so often over the years that I continue to marvel at people who insist that what you wear isn’t important. Why, with one well-executed costume change, you could go from sidekick to leading lady overnight - with all the accompanying benefits.

For example:

    One of my clients has a beautiful figure that she felt she needed to flaunt, particularly in the workplace. A sales rep who liked low-cut tops and thigh-high skirts, she had a high closing rate with men, but a nearly non-existent record with women; she insisted they were jealous of her. When I finally convinced her to try a still-flattering yet more modest approach, it opened a floodgate of orders from women and she literally doubled her inc.ome overnight. Not long after that, she found herself in a serious relationship for the first time in years; she’d resigned herself to short flings and one night stands, because that’s the kind of guys her previously skimpy attire attracted.

The lesson: If you want people to admire your body, flaunt it. If you want people to admire your brain, cover up.

    Another client came to me because she was ticked off that she’d been passed over - AGAIN - for a promotion by someone with less skill and experience. We reviewed her wardrobe and outlined her goals and added a few “power” pieces: tailored jackets, good-quality leather accessories, and a no-nonsense hairstyle. She got the next promotion. Then she got promoted AGAIN a few months later, nearly tripling her salary. She was also elected chapter president of a prominent industry association.

The lesson: Dress for the job you want, not the job you have. Repeat as often as necessary to get where you want to go.

    A stay-at-home mom with a profitable hobby was invited to speak at an industry function and was in a panic over what to wear. She was hoping for more exposure in the industry and wanted to look professional but not corporate. I had her dress in semi-tailored attire. It worked. Her stellar content and professional appearance lead to a dozen more speaking invitations and - much to her surprise — a spokeswoman position for a national retail chain.

The lesson: When you’re standing in the spotlight, you never know who’s looking. Dress to impress.

So are all of these stories coincidental?

Hardly! I could tell dozens more, all of which end far beyond the initial expectation of just looking better.

Why the success?

Because dressing appropriately does MORE than just open doors; in our all-too-casual-society, it makes you stand out and be remembered. In fact, for many people, making the decision to dress correctly is like toppling the first domino in a chain: it has rapid, far-reaching effects.

Why?

People are looking for leaders and role models. If you look good, they’ll notice. If you look good and are smart, they’ll follow you. If you look good, are smart, and have good people skills, “the sky’s the limit” as they say, because it’s an irresistible, all-too-uncommon combination.

Think about it: how many people do you know who are pretty but vapid? How about smart but anti-social? What about fun but unattractive? We all know people like that. How many times have you thought, “Oh, she’d get so much further if she’d only dress better/get her degree/stop being so cynical (or whatever)?” It’s because the more pleasing characteristics you have, the more in-demand you become.

Just as in showbiz, where a “triple threat” (someone who can act, sing, and dance) usually gets more work than someone who has only mastered one art form, so will someone who’s attractive, smart, and a good communicator enjoy a more profitable, fulfilling life than someone who is less skilled.

So as you start this New Year, with all the promise that it holds, think about what you want this year. For many people, their list might include things like:

  • Lose weight
    Quit smoking

  • Regular exercise
  • Get a better job
  • Make more money
  • Get out of debt
  • Invest more
  • Buy a house
  • Find a meaningful relationship
  •  – Etc.

In other words, many people want to look good, feel loved, and have financial stability. Nothing wrong with that. But - hmm. Interesting. If you go back and look at the three stories I told you earlier, you’ll notice how looking good increased the financial stability of each of the women mentioned.

It can do the same for you.

Start with critical assessments of both your person and your situation. If you don’t like something about yourself, make a change. Lose weight; get a new haircut; whiten your teeth, or whatever. If you keep getting passed over for positions or duties you want, ask yourself why. Do you lack the necessary skills? The appropriate appearance? The ability to communicate effectively? Then fill in the gaps by taking classes or upgrading your image.

Follow through. Get it done.

Within a short amount of time, you’ll be astounded by the impact a few changes to your image will make in your life.

“You have the life you have because of the decisions you’ve made,” a mentor once told me. “If you want a different life, make different decisions.”

It’s true.

So if you’re ready for your life to go into a new, better direction, start with how you look, because that’s the first thing people see. Then upgrade your core competencies and work on those people skills. By this time next year, you could be leading a very different life.

Try it yourself and see!

NNeed some more help getting control of your wardrobe once and for all? Then download a copy of WARDROBE MAGIC:

http://www.wardrobemagic.com

And get your New Year started on the right foot.

Wardrobe Magic

 

 

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Popularity: 5% [?]

Holiday Accessorizing

Friday, December 21st, 2007

The finishing touches on your holiday ensemble can literally make or break your outfit. While it’s easy to go overboard with kitsch-y holiday accessories like jingle-bell earrings or ornament-colored bracelets, it’s just as easy to get a stylish, festive look - even if you have to use old pieces to ring in the New Year.

Here are some quick tips to help you look polished and chic for all of your holiday parties:

Shoes

The most popular color for evening shoes is black, with silver following a close second. Shoes can be open or closed toe or open or closed heel, depending on your preference and the style of the outfit. Favorite fabrics include:

    Silk or brocade

    Metallic

    Lucite

    Jeweled

    Satin

    Velvet

To look taller, avoid ankle straps. To draw attention to your feet, where eye-catching shoes and keep the rest of your outfit simple. To spice up basic leather pumps, add a flashy clip-on earring in the front.

Whatever style or material you choose, be sure to keep your shoes in the same mood and weight as your outfit. Slinky dresses call for slinky shoes, for example, while heavy fabrics (velvet, leather) call for heavier shoes.

If you’ll be wearing a new pair of shoes to a function, break them in before you go. If the soles are slippery, stand in your driveway or on the sidewalk and twist your foot against the ground as if you were extinguishing a cigarette. This will scuff up the bottoms enough to give you a little traction.

Whatever you do, make sure you wear comfortable shoes. Nothing will spoil your party mood faster than standing for hours in shoes that pinch or bind.

Hosiery

Evening hosiery should be sheer and may include embellishments like seams, rhinestones, and embroidery. If you opt for such details, choose a simple dress style to avoid competing for attention with your legs.

Time-honored guidelines for hosiery include:

    1. Keep it in the same color base as your garment.

    2. To look taller and trimmer, go monochromatic by matching the color tone of your hosiery to your shoes and hem.

    3. With neutral-colored skirt or pants, match all three color elements. Example: brown skirt, camel-colored hose, brown shoes.

    4. With a brightly colored garment, choose neutral-colored shoes and match hose to shoes. Example: red dress, taupe hose, and taupe shoes.

    5. Keep leg coverings in the same mood and weight as your shoes.

Should you or shouldn’t you...wear hosiery with an evening gown and sandals? There are some purists who instantly say, “no way!” but being grounded in reality and knowing that all legs are not created equal, here’s what I suggest:

If you live in a warm climate, have beautiful legs and a perfect pedicure, skip the hose.

If you live in a cold climate, have legs that look better with hose than without, or unattractive feet (like most dancers I know), wear hosiery.

In the end, it really boils down to what you feel most comfortable wearing.

Handbag

Evening bags should be small and delicate, with only enough room for your money, keys, lipstick, and tissue. Like everything else we’ve talked about, it should be in the same tone as the rest of your ensemble, and compliment your outfit. Pearled, rhinestone, satin, and velvet clutches have been popular for years, and are a good investment. With care, they will last for many years.

Jewelry

This is the time of year to pull out your “good” jewelry. Make sure it’s clean and that all the clasps are strong and in good repair before your big night on the town.

Intricate evening clothes call for simple or no jewelry. Elaborate jewelry calls for simple but elegant evening clothes. If you have beautiful jewels, wear them. Just make sure they don’t complete with your clothes for attention.

Want a fun way to show the holiday spirit? Pull out your seasonal pins from years past to add a quick, festive touch.

Adding snappy accessories needn’t be a challenge. Just remember to keep it simple and elegant and you’ll turn heads wherever you go.

Need some more ideas on how to accessorize correctly? Download a copy of ACCESSORY MAGIC to see how easy accessorizing can be:

http://www.accessorymagic.com

Accessory Magic

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

 

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Popularity: 5% [?]

Holiday Accessorizing

Friday, December 21st, 2007

The finishing touches on your holiday ensemble can literally make or break your outfit. While it’s easy to go overboard with kitsch-y holiday accessories like jingle-bell earrings or ornament-colored bracelets, it’s just as easy to get a stylish, festive look - even if you have to use old pieces to ring in the New Year.

Here are some quick tips to help you look polished and chic for all of your holiday parties:

Shoes

The most popular color for evening shoes is black, with silver following a close second. Shoes can be open or closed toe or open or closed heel, depending on your preference and the style of the outfit. Favorite fabrics include:

    Silk or brocade

    Metallic

    Lucite

    Jeweled

    Satin

    Velvet

To look taller, avoid ankle straps. To draw attention to your feet, where eye-catching shoes and keep the rest of your outfit simple. To spice up basic leather pumps, add a flashy clip-on earring in the front.

Whatever style or material you choose, be sure to keep your shoes in the same mood and weight as your outfit. Slinky dresses call for slinky shoes, for example, while heavy fabrics (velvet, leather) call for heavier shoes.

If you’ll be wearing a new pair of shoes to a function, break them in before you go. If the soles are slippery, stand in your driveway or on the sidewalk and twist your foot against the ground as if you were extinguishing a cigarette. This will scuff up the bottoms enough to give you a little traction.

Whatever you do, make sure you wear comfortable shoes. Nothing will spoil your party mood faster than standing for hours in shoes that pinch or bind.

Hosiery

Evening hosiery should be sheer and may include embellishments like seams, rhinestones, and embroidery. If you opt for such details, choose a simple dress style to avoid competing for attention with your legs.

Time-honored guidelines for hosiery include:

    1. Keep it in the same color base as your garment.

    2. To look taller and trimmer, go monochromatic by matching the color tone of your hosiery to your shoes and hem.

    3. With neutral-colored skirt or pants, match all three color elements. Example: brown skirt, camel-colored hose, brown shoes.

    4. With a brightly colored garment, choose neutral-colored shoes and match hose to shoes. Example: red dress, taupe hose, and taupe shoes.

    5. Keep leg coverings in the same mood and weight as your shoes.

Should you or shouldn’t you...wear hosiery with an evening gown and sandals? There are some purists who instantly say, “no way!” but being grounded in reality and knowing that all legs are not created equal, here’s what I suggest:

If you live in a warm climate, have beautiful legs and a perfect pedicure, skip the hose.

If you live in a cold climate, have legs that look better with hose than without, or unattractive feet (like most dancers I know), wear hosiery.

In the end, it really boils down to what you feel most comfortable wearing.

Handbag

Evening bags should be small and delicate, with only enough room for your money, keys, lipstick, and tissue. Like everything else we’ve talked about, it should be in the same tone as the rest of your ensemble, and compliment your outfit. Pearled, rhinestone, satin, and velvet clutches have been popular for years, and are a good investment. With care, they will last for many years.

Jewelry

This is the time of year to pull out your “good” jewelry. Make sure it’s clean and that all the clasps are strong and in good repair before your big night on the town.

Intricate evening clothes call for simple or no jewelry. Elaborate jewelry calls for simple but elegant evening clothes. If you have beautiful jewels, wear them. Just make sure they don’t complete with your clothes for attention.

Want a fun way to show the holiday spirit? Pull out your seasonal pins from years past to add a quick, festive touch.

Adding snappy accessories needn’t be a challenge. Just remember to keep it simple and elegant and you’ll turn heads wherever you go.

Need some more ideas on how to accessorize correctly? Download a copy of ACCESSORY MAGIC to see how easy accessorizing can be:

http://www.accessorymagic.com

Accessory Magic

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

 

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Popularity: 5% [?]

The Art of the Schmooze

Thursday, December 13th, 2007

One of the great things about holiday parties is that you can catch up with old friends yet still meet new people. You never know where a new contact may lead or what fascinating tidbits a drunk colleague might reveal during a pleasant evening of socializing.

But for some people, parties are pure torture. They’d just as soon be drawn and quartered as to make idle chit-chat with people they don’t know.

If that’s you, fear not. All it takes is a little preparation to turn a room full of strangers into a Rolodex™ full of contacts. Here are some simple tips from Dr. Lillian Glass, author of “Say It Right: How to Talk in Any Social or Business Situation” (Perigee Books, 1991) that you can use to break the ice and draw people in:

1. Ask Questions

Most people love to talk about themselves. All you have to do is ask. But don’t go for the same-old: “What do you do?”, “Where do you work?”, “How many kids do you have?” routine. Instead, try an off-beat, open-ended question. Start with a statement followed by a question, like:

    “That’s a lovely necklace! Is it an heirloom?”

    “You’re an accountant? I hate numbers! What drew you to that line of work?”

    “I met Joan (the hostess) when I rear-ended her in the parking lot. Where do you know her from?”

…or something similar. Easy topics to quickly engage strangers include current events, offers of assistance (”May I refill your drink?”), or pleas for help (”What is that lady’s name again? It just went right out of my head!”).

Humor breaks the ice nicely, but don’t push it if it doesn’t come easily to you. If the person you’re trying to engage isn’t friendly or acts like you’re intruding on her conversation, move on. There are plenty of other people longing for someone to talk to.

2. Introduce Others With a Flourish

Ever been introduced to someone with a “Sue, this is Leslie, Leslie, this is Sue” approach? Probably. All you can do is say “hello” and nod or shake hands. But if you introduce others and offer a little background information, you give people a place to start talking. It’s a great way to break the ice.

For example:

“Sue, this is Leslie Smith. She’s one of the best patent attorneys in town and a home room mom for her son’s fourth grade class. Leslie, this is Sue Finkelstein. Sue has her own PR firm, and one of the accounts they handle is your favorite shoe store, Sloan’s.”

With just a few more words of introduction, you’ve given these two people a lot to talk about. Not only have you made it easy for them to converse, you come across as a great conversationalist.

3. Get In and Out

If you have several commitments on the same night or are faced with an invitation that would be politically unwise to ignore, opt for the “drive by” or “putting in an appearance” approach. The goal is to get in, get out, and get on with the evening.

Here’s how:

Arrive when the party’s already in full swing, about 30 minutes late. You don’t want to be the first ones there. Bring a hostess gift, if appropriate. Greet the host and take whatever drink he’s offering-even if you don’t want to drink it. Walk around for at least 30 minutes and speak to at least five or six people. Be a part of the party while you’re there.

When you’re ready to go, make a point of saying goodbye to the host, and offer a vague excuse that’s as close to the truth as you can get without hurting the host’s feelings, like “The sitter can only stay until 9″, or “We have tickets”, or “We have company coming” or something like that. Don’t go into elaborate detail, particularly if it’s a fib. It will come back to haunt you and cause ill feelings.

Once the goodbyes are said, don’t linger. Leave without a scene.

4. Ditch Annoying People

So what if your conversational skills engage someone who’s annoying, rude, or too clingy to let you go? You can make a graceful exit several ways, including:

    Look over his/her shoulder and saying, “Oh, there’s so-and-so. I need to ask her something before I forget. Please excuse me.”

    “I need to powder my nose.”

    “How I do run on! Please, don’t let me keep you from the other people you came here to see.”

Then cut and run.

5. Drink Responsibly

This should go without saying, but during the holidays, rules tend to get lax. If you’re the designated driver, don’t drink. If you’re not, try to limit your alcohol consumption to one drink every two hours, particularly if you’re around colleagues. “Loose lips sink ships” and can undermine your career if you’re not careful.

6. Be The Life Of The Party-Within Reason

There are some people who love to be the center of attention and view the office party or family gathering is a welcomed stage.

Some folks are natural performers and do quite well in these venues, garnering themselves scads of invitations as a result. In her book “Personality Plus,” author Florence Littauer tells how she and her brother, both extroverts, kept their weekends booked during high school by being entertaining guests. They would read the newspaper the morning of a party, and spend the rest of the day making up and rehearsing funny conversations about what they’d read. Come party time, their banter back and forth, which appeared completely impromptu to the other guests, would put people in stitches and become the hit of the party. If you’d like to be a welcomed and frequent guest, experiment with this technique.

On the other end of the spectrum, of course, is the uncomfortable “scene”. The obnoxious drunk. The belligerent husband. The emotionally-charged mother-in-law. How, exactly do you handle THOSE situations?

If you’re the host, you need to discharge the situation as quickly as possible or it can ruin the whole event. As uncomfortable as it is, tell the person flat out that his or her behavior is unacceptable. Pull him aside and tell him that he’s had too much to drink, that she’s too upset to think clearly, or whatever the situation, and ask them to leave. If they’re drunk, call a cab for them.

If the obnoxious person has a reputation for this kind of behavior, don’t invite him. Or, put him on notice before the party: “If you cause another scene, Dad, it will be the last time you’re invited.” Then, stick with the threat.

7. Talk, Don’t Eat

One of the hardest things to do gracefully at a party is to hold a drink, a plate full of food, and a conversation at the same time. It’s easy to make a mess of all of them. To keep problems to a minimum, don’t go hungry to a cocktail party. Eat before you go.

That’s right. Eat ahead of time. It worked for Scarlett O’Hara, and it will work for you. With a full stomach, you’ll be less likely to drop food on your clothes, get smashed on half a glass of champagne, or thicken your waistline by grazing on hors d’oeuvres.

Other tips:

    1. Carry a clutch and hold it all night. With your purse in one hand a drink in the other, there’s no hand left over for eating.

    2. Order a Virgin Mary as your cocktail of choice. You won’t get drunk, and the tomato juice will act as an appetite suppressant.

    3. Keep sugar-free mints handy. They give you something to chew on without having to eat.

 
Whatever you do this holiday season, remember that parties are for having fun and meeting new people, so enjoy yourself. If you go with an eye toward entertainment, you’re sure to have a good time.

Need some ideas for what to wear this holiday season? Check out the evening clothing capsule concept in WARDROBE MAGIC:

http://www.wardrobemagic.com

Wardrobe Magic

 

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Popularity: 5% [?]

Fun Gifts for Fashion Lovers

Thursday, December 6th, 2007

Have a few fashion lovers on your shopping list this year? Trying to think of what you can tell others to get YOU? You’re in luck! From stocking stuffers to scene stealers, budget-friendly to wildly extravagant, here are some fun gift ideas you can use to get the “It’s perfect! Just what I wanted!” response you want.

Beauty Classics

Looking for some tried-and-true beauty classics that would be welcomed in any stocking? Peruse the 2007 BEST OF BEAUTY Master List from the Editors of Allure Magazine. They review hundreds of products in dozens of categories to find the best performers. Some are old classics, some are new favorites, all are sure to be a hit with the fashion-savvy on your list.

Scent Sampler 

Like the idea of giving perfume but not sure which fragrance is right? No problem! Sephora’s Scent Sampler allows you to give samples of ten of their most popular fragrances (Philosophy Inner Grace, Vera Wang Princess, Givenchy Very Irresistable, among others) so the recipient can try them all and choose her favorite. Then she can redeem a gift certificate at Sephora for a full sized sample of the one she liked best. Great idea! Some restrictions apply, so be sure to read the fine print.

 

Scent Sampler
Sephora.com

 

Luxurious Muffler

A luxurious muffler looks great, feels great, and can update an old coat in a flash. If you have someone on your list who’s fussy or hard to buy for, give them a beautiful muffler and see how often they wear it. With all the compliments such pieces tend to generate, it will probably be a lot.

 

Luxurious muffler
Overstock.com

 

Diamond Stud Earrings

Simple, classic, elegant. If your favorite fashionista doesn’t have a pair of diamond stud earrings, perhaps you should get her some. Beautiful pieces are often worn for years and passed down through generations, so don’t be afraid to splurge. You’re sure to get your money’s worth.